A Day In The Life Of An Ambulance Driver - Latest Comments in Status Dramaticus

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Stace — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 08:14:21 -0000

That's awesome! Just randomly stumbled across your blog. Unusual to find both quality content and writing talent online, and you've got both :)

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Jon — Wed, 05 Aug 2009 10:04:11 -0000

I have to ask: Will you have to adopt RP?

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TOTWTYTR — Wed, 05 Aug 2009 01:52:12 -0000

Then there was the time the guy woke up from his "I want to be seen faster" seizure in the ER waiting room. Only to see us all standing around holding up index cards with his scores on them. He might have won, but for the damned East German judge giving him a low score.

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medicblog999 — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 17:52:43 -0000

A 9000 word blog post!!!!

Great reading, you had me hooked from the get go.

I always remember my first "fake" seizure. I asked my partner what was going on, is that a fit??

"No son, thats not a fit, hes just being a very naughty boy!!"

Classic

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Linda — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 11:08:22 -0000

Great post AD.

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TOTWTYTR — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 10:45:59 -0000

"RP obediently relays the message, receiving a bewildered "Unit calling?" in reply."

They must teach them that at dispatcher school. We have one that says, "That last eunuch...?"

Which is why I never answer here.

"At that, Frank smiles defiantly and holds out his hands for the cuffs. "Bring it on, motherfucker," he challenges"

As the cops around here say, "Play stupid games, win stupid prizes."

One of my partners once observed that if they could put bullshit filters on the 9-1-1 phones, we'd be down to two calls a shift. System wide.

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911 and the Randomness.. — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 08:58:45 -0000

I like to think so. Even if I'm not, my parnter kicks butt. So at least 1 exists.. We just aren't in your state. :)

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Tom — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 06:06:40 -0000

You have a flare for writing. I love the waspish comments and funny observations.

Simply excellent.

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Anonymous — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 22:24:59 -0000

AD, my wife hates you. I keep interrupting her with my laughing while she's trying to watch some inane TV show. Thanks... ;-)

BTW, in the Chair Force, our response to a call from base CP was "Say again Command Post, you're coming in garbled and stupid"

I'm too chicken to try "Gourd Head" with our Fire Board. There's too few people on the air, and ours DOES pay attention.

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Zdogk9 — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 22:22:37 -0000

Ya ever get RP's mother's phone #?

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reflectoscope — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 20:49:50 -0000

I'm again impressed with your ability to write so that the reader can get a vivid sense of what it is like to be there with feet on the ground.

Jim

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Ambulance Driver — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 15:31:59 -0000

911, you must be one of those competent and professional dispatchers who possesses common sense and looks after their crews.

I've always believed they existed, but suspected they just worked a different shift than mine.

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911 and the Randomness.. — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 15:27:48 -0000

I loved this post! Even being a dispatcher, (who is not a goldfish) and my medics will be using tin-foil and gourd head also..

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threadbndr — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 15:17:47 -0000

Heya, AD - W, my late husband had the real deal - complex even (both grand and pet mal). It took us a couple of days (and the first witnessed grand mal) to figure out what the hades was going on and get him on meds.

The fakers make me ill, since the real thing is no fun.

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Crucis — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 13:52:26 -0000

Nice post, AD. I've missed these.

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Ambulance Driver — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 12:48:37 -0000

1. Because they're attention-seeking idiots.

2. Because even though they're attention seeking idiots, they're still not very good fakers.

Actually, most of the fakers do want to go to the hospital. On this particular night, they didn't.

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ktzf — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 12:43:55 -0000

Ok, so maybe being a more upstanding member of society, I don't get it. AD, if you could explain to me:

1. Why somone would fake a seizure in the first place.

2. Post fake seizure, why would they refuse to go to the hospital?

Don't make much sense to me...

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Jumblerant — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 11:43:15 -0000

AD: Thanks for the great blog, really lifted my day. And FYI, the long blog looks really good in Google Reader, especially after all those 2 liner bloggings out there.

And I guess I should mention 'Cycles & More' for the rankings. And whilst I'm at it, I guess you're going to be Google Numero 1 for 'Gourd Head' too. Yes, 'Gourd Head'.

I did mention 'Gourd Head' didn't I?

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Anonymous — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 11:35:42 -0000

At least you didn't have to deal with someone who siezed after having work done at 'Cycles and More'.
(Gotta keep your ranking up there, ya know?)

Inchworm

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NHMomma — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 11:30:05 -0000

A great read! What a shift! Makes me miss the urban life, where we were a free taxi.

Thanks for the laughs!

Tin foil!

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Matt M — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 10:38:47 -0000

A great read. Thanks for dealing with the fools, and helping the ones who really need help, AD.

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crs224akameema — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 09:44:12 -0000

Just went thru two incidents of a guy working for me having seizures - legitimate ones, but he is fine once they are done. Now in the process of telling people what to do when he has one, if his meds change doesn't stop them, and it does not include calling 911 unless he is actually injured, or doesn't start to come around within a few minutes.
Seizures (noun): definition: a word to cover any otherwise unknown real or self-induced behavior that those around the alleged patient don't want to deal with.

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murse c — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 02:19:29 -0000

And I hope AC realizes why their calls are deleyed. It wastes precious time and money responding to all those nimrods crying wolf. The abuse of the system is preposterous but that's nothing new since EMTALA came into effect.

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murse c — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 02:11:36 -0000

Nice read. Being a nurse and having recently completed my basic, I am fired up that the local JC is considering a bridge for nurse to paramedic and I think paramedics are too much under appreciated by RN's and docs. Riding in the back of a rig makes you appreciate all the BS that you field guys have to put up with so it really pisses me off to see RN's belittle field medics. I unfortunately saw it from other nurses in a different hospital than the one I work in. None of them knew I was an RN while I completed my rotations as a basic. I am thinking if they (RN's that have never worked in the field in emergency medicine) could get past their academic snobbery they might have a much more enlightened look on what the real world is like. Nurses need to learn what it's like to do CPR in the dirt instead of from a table waist up. It really opens your eyes. Keep up the good reads.

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Ambulance Driver — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 01:38:02 -0000

AC, the 911 operator usually keeps you on the line to get more information for the responding crews.

Likely as not, those crews are already on their way to you long before the 911 operator lets you hang up.

They run through a set of scripted cards with the appropriate questions printed on them. The theory is that the questions help determine the exact nature of the emergency and thus help the 911 operator dispatch the appropriate resources.

It's a matter of some debate as to whether those dispatch protocols actually accomplish that goal, but rarely if ever are the resources held up until they've finished the script. They usually send them as soon as they know the address.